Lindsey Graham is dead and somehow the war with Iran continues. Stephen Miller declared liberalism a form of domestic terrorism and ICE is still killing people at an unsettling pace.

Lindsey Graham’s sister was named as his replacement, which makes almost zero sense. I’m sure the historical among you will point out that in the past a Senator would be replaced by his wife (his sister is not his wife, at least, not in this Southern case) at least until a proper election could be had.

And yes, when it took 18 days to take a horse drawn carriage from South Carolina to DC it made perfect sense for the wife, and fellow resident of the Senator’s state, to take over until things can be done properly.

Hell, we could get the soldiers who are helicoptering JD Vance’s kids around and have them shuttle someone up to DC from the low country.

But also, at the end of the day, we know that Congress doesn’t matter at all anymore so who cares? Put the first AI Senator in Graham’s place and get a head start on the descent of man.

Anyway, here’s what’s coming next week:The King’s Playground: I mentioned this piece in last week’s wrap up. It is the short story that got me (finally) into the second round of one of these contests I’m always writing for. Not to build up too much hype, but here are some highlights from the feedback I received:"

One thing I like about contests is they force me to actually write— I can’t just ‘have writers block’ or feel like I have no inspiration. They also force me out of my comfort zone, this piece in particular being a fairy tale, something I would never ordinarily write unprompted.

The work on this piece, especially the narrative perspective, has spurred me on to write more fairy tale/mythic pieces.

I was hoping to share the results of a second contest, this one a 500 word story, but the results have been pushed back a day. It is another genre I ordinarily don’t write (Historical Fiction) but hopefully I get a group of judges that get my sense of humor (you’ll be able to read the story near the end of the month).

What I’m reading:Ball Four: Jim Bouton’s Ball Four is many things. A masterpiece, a game changer, a menace… it is also the exact book I needed to read (for the umpteenth time) this year.

For those who don’t know Ball Four is a daily diary of Jim Bouton’s season with the Seattle Pilots as well as a recollection of his baseball career.

What are the Seattle Pilots? might be your first question. They are a team whose first, and only year (1969), of existence coincided with Jim Bouton attempting to keep his career going. They went broke in that one year and in 1970 started life anew as the Milwaukee Brewers, sans Mr. Bouton. They are one of only two teams to exist for one year in one city before moving on.

Ball Four is the first ‘behind the scenes’ book about sports. It gave all the clubhouse stories, the conflicts between players and management, the way teams tried to screw players when it came to contracts.

The book made Bouton very unpopular with many in the league.

When I first read the book as a kid the appeal was obvious. An unvarnished look at baseball players and how they can be stupid and vulgar— a look into how the hell do these grown men live day to day when they’re constantly traveling from city to city. Also, there is another grown man who hangs out in the lobby of their hotel to make sure they’re in bed on time.

What hit me this time is how all those baseball weirdos are just a microcosm of The U.S. at large. We’re vulgar but we don’t want anybody to know. As a society, more and more, we shun those who are smart, are experts, or try to make more of themselves. And, of course, we do things because it is the way it is always done. There is nothing we hate more than freethinkers who are trying to change the way things are done.

I know you’re going to bristle at that, but I don’t care. We’ve all been stuck in inefficient workplaces that do things ‘because that’s the way we’ve always done them’. We like innovation, we hate change.

Anyway, is the book good? Yes, it’s amazing. However, it was written in 1969 so there are lots of things that hit weird now as you read them— lots of boys being boys stories referring to black people as negroes and talk of the ghetto problem. Not surprising, baseball clubhouses of the late 60’s were not a breeding ground for progressive civil rights policy.

At the end of the day, it is less a baseball book and more an anthropological study. A Gorillas in the Mist tale, an inside look at a world that we’ll never inhabit, yet is somehow strangely familiar.

Also, Jim Bouton invented Big League Chew. Not an important detail, but one that always amuses me.

Oh, and that other ‘one year one city’ team? The 1901 Milwaukee Brewers who moved to St. Louis in 1902 and spent half a century of futility there as the St. Louis Browns before moving to Baltimore and becoming the Orioles.

Things I noticed just now was I was typing all of this. Baltimore’s baseball team used to be the St. Louis Browns and their football team, the Ravens, used to be the Cleveland Browns. Life lesson- don’t get too attached to a team named the Browns.

The Brewers went 0-3 since last week’s update, getting swept by the Pittsburgh Pirates right before the all-star break. I’ll be real, the last month or so leading up to the break was brutal, few days off, and the five games in four days in St. Louis directly before the trip to Pittsburgh. The boys are still comfortably in first, have nine straight games at home right after the break (and some off days). I’m excited to see what the second half has in store!

Till next week!

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